i loved lori. always did. i could ‘feel’ her growing up. i knew she may have left me physically, but never mentally. that sounds so cheesey, i know, but it is honest.
and like you, we share many of the same tastes in things. like owning the same shower curtain. funny.

now my bfather, i wasnt so sure about him. him being a father and not carrying me for nine months i thought he may have forgotten about me. >i know, i am an idiot for thinking that, but again, its my honest feeling<
i was so wrong. he never forgot about me, he loved me. and i fell for him the moment i looked into those eyes (my eyes) and it was all over. i felt something so sudden and powerful i cant even explain it to you. i had always felt lori, but him, he was a long way off for me. but to have him there, looking at me, hugging me-god-i cant give you the words to make you understand. i was awe-struck.

lori was comfortable, warm and natural. he was new, scary and emotional. i was scared and content at the same time.

i have the 4 best parents in the world.

Growing up, I went through all kinds of emotions and feelings about my bio-parents. I didn’t feel love in my heart right away. Always curious, yes. The story that the agency gave on the non-ID information was horrible and so unaccurate (thanks to a family member protecting their reputation). So for a long time I had a distorted view of my bio-mother. They made her out to be some kind of “fast- tailed” little girl. For that reason, I wasn’t sure that I wanted to ever meet. My a-parents NEVER said anything negative about her, they told me to give her a chance b/c she could be different now. (Keep in mind that at the time of these thoughts, I was only a child).

Then I went through a phase where I was so desperate to know her and to understand why she had to put me up for adoption. I even thought about getting pregnant at 15, to see what it was like and then maybe I would understand the reasoning of my bio-mother. (Thankfully I did not take that route).

I didn’t truly feel REAL LOVE for her until I had my own children and then I did understand. I understood that it had to be hard for her to do that and it was no doubt, a very loving thing to do on my behalf. Once I met her, she told me what REALLY happened…………. none of her past was her fault. I wasn’t a choice. Someone took her innocence from her…… I felt so bad for all my pre-judgements and misguided anger! She is a very courageous woman who has been through a lot. I love her so much now that I really know her.

I always thought that I only looked like my a-family. I have never looked so much like someone before in all my life, until I met my bio-mother. Its a complicated relationship, yes, but I am so THANKFUL to have the chance to even know her. We have so much in common. Attitude, style, how we talk, our voice, even what we do for a living and oh my goodness!!! Our middle name is the same and she had nothing to do with naming me!!! My a-parents never even knew her name until I did my search.

I did, however have “expectaions” and my little fantasy in my head (where it stays, lol). My Mother (a-mother) was a great mother with all the maternal instincts in the world and now I have 4 children and I try to mimic that b/c its all that I know. So when I met my bio-mother, I guess I expected the same from her……. That is not the case. I just didn’t know. But due to the circumstances, I understand and fully accept her for what and who she is. We just take it one day at a time. Its been almost 6 yrs. and we are still learning. Regardless, its been a blessing. I am thankful to have so much family. Its been in its essence a truly beautiful journey.

No, I was not in love with my parents. I had very little expectations of a relationship. I was more just fascinated to see them and get to know them. My father I only met once so there’s no love there really, but my mother who I’ve slowly gotten to know over time, I can say that I love her. It didn’t happen overnight, but like any relationship it grew into what it is now.

ETA: I just have to say that I CANNOT BELIEVE THAT SOMEONE GAVE STINKY PETE A THUMBS DOWN! The person who did that must have a heart of stone. Shame on you.

I did my best to have no expectations so I wouldn’t be let down. And I didn’t expect someone I’d pretty much never met to be “in love” with me–the thought is a bit frightening really.

But I had expected to find someone who was in some way “like me.” While my first mother matches up with what I’d been told in my non-ID info, and I looked a lot like her as a child,our personalities and interests couldn’t be more different. I’m a bit jealous of all the adoptees who found someone like them.

But I’m still glad I searched because it’s better to know more than I did before.

do tell. ugh. i love my birth mom because she gave me to my real mom. seriusly.

I was kinda shocked by some answers. As a first mom I love my child just as much and exactly the same as her siblings that live with me. They are all my babies and I will love the until the day I die. It is not my daughters fault that she does not live with me. Why should the love I give her be any different? I would give my life for her just as quickly as I would her siblings. So yes I am very in love with my lost child.
I don’t really have any expectations for reunion. I figure it will be up to her. She will always have a place in my family if she wants it. And her place in the family is equal to any other family member

I had no expectations that she would love me, but I hoped she might like and not **** me. Of course she is my child and I love her. She says she loves us and we are grateful that she accepts us in her life.

Yes I loved my n-parents, I loved them for who they were to me. I can’t say I was “in love” with them or that I loved them in the sense that you love someone you actually know; I know that’s a hard one to explain. But, they created me, they gave me life, and they are both parts of who I am. So for that, I have always loved them.

I always knew where they were from; I had no expectations, and didn’t really care either way how they turned out. I don’t value people for their net worth; I value them for WHO they are.

When I found out that my nparents actually got married, it was icing on the cake; having a full brother was the cherry on top. Maybe my loving feeling for them stems from the fact that I was conceived in love (god I sound like some kind of hippie lol) but you know, it could have something to do with it. They loved each other, so maybe somehow on a cellular level I always knew that. I don’t know. I’m just rambling now.

I don’t know my mother all that well yet, it has taken her many years to face her grief and pain, and I only met my father once before he passed away. But I love them. I love my mother enough to wait over 10 years for her. Most people would have walked away after being ignored for that long.

I was in love with the idea of my mother but not my mother herself, I grew to love her by living with her and knowing her as a person.

I am very much in love with my son, as much so as I am in love with his sisters. I raised him for two years, the bond that we had can not be erased. For him it may be very different and I am accepting of the fact that he will not love me the way I love him.

The only thing I expected was that we would *fit*. I had so many people tell me that, when we reunited, I would fit my bfamily perfectly, that we would have so much in common, and it is not the case. I love her, but we don’t really have much in common. She gets along well with my mom, so that helps, but we didn’t mirror each other.

Other than that, I didn’t expect much of anything, so I was thrilled that my bmom accepted me as I was, that she didn’t push too hard or try to parent me, I was also thrilled that my mom brought her into our family, making holidays easier and less pressure to make sure everyone else was *OK* with the situation.

I don’t know – I guess I had it very easy.